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One day I was tweeting something and I thought it might be fun to open up a new Twitter account under the name “God” and tweet stuff like this. The name had already been taken, of course, probably about 18 seconds after Twitter was invented. I don’t follow God on Twitter so I can’t say what he/she is using it for. Other examples of what I might have tweeted as God:
Just cured a guy of leprosy, gave about 7 million other people cancer.
I could stop wars anytime I want but without cable, what would I watch?
Dave, if you’re going to cheat on your wife, I’m going to introduce her to a hot trainer at the gym.
Hurricane Katrina wasn’t about the iniquities of New Orleans. I was trying to teach you how to build a decent levee.
No prayers this weekend, please, I’m taking some time off.
My ancient cartoon for the day is from February of 1996. I’ve done a number of satires of Family Circus over the years, as have lots of other cartoonists, and I should mention that Bil Keane is a great sport about it. The first time I did it, he called me the next day (scaring me to death) and asked for the original art for his collection. I traded it to him for a Sunday panel of FC, one in which the dead grandpa ghost appears. Bil even used my name in his cartoon one time. If my archives were arranged in a way that I could find anything specific, I’d post it here. It was a picture of Billy and Jeffy talking to each other with their dad in the background listening. Billy says, “The Piraro’s dad wears gold chains and an earring, all our dad wears is glasses and deodorant.”
I have never worn a gold chain in my life, but I do have earrings. Still, it was fun to be a part of Family Circus.