Bizarro is brought to you today by A Second Chance At Life!
As you may have surmised from this post, I did not die in Hurricane Irene. Though I was up every hour all night long clearing a drain just outside our back door that keeps getting clogged with leaves and funneling water toward our bedroom, and I could easily have been hit by a flying patio chair from a neighbor’s balcony and killed, I wasn’t.
So now I feel as though I’ve been given a second chance at life. Especially since we did not lose our electricity, which all by itself would be as close to death as I hope to come in my lifetime. And power outages spark looting, which is a concern, even though I’m pretty sure Jesus would have protected our property.
Actually, I feel as though I’ve been given a third chance at life because one time, years ago, I pulled out in front of a car that I totally did not see coming and was almost in an auto accident. Wow, that was close.
In my neighborhood, we got a lot of rain and high winds, but not too much damage. Here is a pic of an amputated branch across the sidewalk on the corner of my block. Residents have been dealing with this misfortune in different ways: some walk around, others step over. New Yorkers are resilient that way.
This is a shot of a brownstone just around the corner, the inhabitants of which have taped their windows to protect from flying glass. Disappointingly, none were broken. What a waste of tape and human effort.
CHNW and I took in all of our patio furniture and potted plants –– a grueling 15-minute ordeal of walking and carrying –– but most dramatically, I brought my motorcycles into the house. Here is a lovely, blurry cell phone pic of them in my apartment. They look good there, I may leave them for a few days. Thank goodness we don’t own a car, our apartment isn’t big enough to hold one.
The most amazing evidence of the storm by far is the empty can (see below) that I found in our backyard. If you look closely, you’ll see that it is New England Clam Chowder. The powerful, swirling winds of this unforgettably enormous storm somehow managed to pick it up in Boston, and deposit it in our backyard here in Brooklyn. Amazing!
We also found a baby sleeping in a crib at the top of our backyard tree, holding a rose in a bud vase and a brick with a piece of straw driven through it. But those kinds of things are common in Tornado Alley, where I was raised, so I didn’t bother to take a picture.
Now that I’m still alive, I’m going to continue my cartoon career. Look forward to more posts in the coming days.
Buy something on this site now or the terrorists win.
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Really, really good one today, Dan (8/28). Really good.
Sandra
Glad you’re still around!
Glad you didn’t die. We lost power down here in RVA. Still awaiting a fix. Skinny-dipping Muppets are actually sorta creepy.
Just thinking aloud, but you don’t really want your neighbours to have gone to all that trouble for nothing …? A quick heft of a half-brick should take care of at least one window
Good point. Hmm.
You crack me up,lol…if you want to see some of the results of Irene…who everyone completely forgot about once New York was mentioned…look at my profile, my wine sippin patio was a mess…stay safe.
Naming the storm after Irene Ryan was perfect. Thanks!
Skinny-dipping muppets: I laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed!
Glad the can of clam chowder missed you. I’d be careful this week, after the quake and hurricane, I imagine locusts might be next.
That’s a pontsig full of insight!
Loved the Muppets comic – a stroke of genius (perhaps the backstroke? HA!).
Also, when I first saw that pic of Jesus you linked to, I thought he was holding a rifle. I think someone should Photoshop that ASAP.
Your wish is my command.
He wasn’t holding a rifle?! I looked at that and thought, yep, only in the US… just shows you how preconceptions make you see things that aren’t there, haha
Dan, you have been through a lot. Are you in the middle of making a movie? – this plot sounds familiar.
Nice bikes. Glad you moved them inside and thanks for the picture. Those babies are like children.
Loved the Sunday panel. Brilliant.
Re: taping windows: I’m always amused when I see this; especially when they use inch-wide making tape and only put it on the inside pane of their double-glazed window.
And yes, I always want to toss a stone, just to show my appreciation for their effort.
Loved the Sunday panel. Brilliant.
Re: taping windows: I’m always amused when I see this; especially when they use inch-wide making tape and only put it on the inside pane of their double-glazed window.
And yes, I always want to toss a stone, just to show my appreciation for their effort.
(Sorry for the double-post, I messed up the tags.)
How could you not dig this gag? Well done.
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Glad to hear you’re alive. The storm was downgraded to a tropical storm right around the time it made landfall. Apparently, even Irene knows you don’t mess with Brooklyn. :)
Good you didn’t draw the rest of those muppets. Could hav been ugly!
By the way; I thought this strip had an unusually detailed background and generally a quite artistic look to it. Do you do “ordinary” art too?
Yes, I do oil paintings from time to time.
Dan is being modest (I didn’t know he could do that!). Use the Buy Bizarro Original Art link at the top of the page. Click on Gallery. At the Gallery page, click on Fine Art. It is an amazing collection that will be worth millions 100 years after Dan passes away.
Sorry Dan. That is just how it seems to work.
Of course, by then, a can of Pepsi will cost $800,000, so it won’t be such a big deal. :o)
“Actually, I feel as though I’ve been given a third chance at life because one time, years ago, I pulled out in front of a car that I totally did not see coming and was almost in an auto accident. Wow, that was close.”
I hate to say it, but I think you jinxed yourself there?!?
I’m glad you (plural) are all right. I really wish that there weren’t so many motorcycle accidents. Someone a few weeks ago had a horrible one near where I work. I won’t go into gory details, but there were gory details to not go into. Take care and be safe!
P.S. The stinky smell of your hospital visit is both gross, and hilarious! Esspecially the staff having to search for the agrieved party.
I hadn’t thought of that, but you’re right. Although in this case, I was just driving down a main road and someone pulled out in front of me.
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