Hey, boys and girls! Here’s the big news you’ve all been waiting for! My new book, Bizarro Heroes, is finally out and available for purchase! That means you can hold a copy in your own hands and point your own eyes at it for hours of pure intellectual amusement. (If you’re a very slow reader. Average readers will get through it in less than an hour. Speed readers in 37.9 seconds.)
This book is perfect for holiday gifts or just for adding to your own collection of artifacts and heirlooms. It’s full of Bizarro cartoons that have to do with super heroes, comic book crime fighters, that kind of stuff. Some go all the way back to the late 1900s. A MUST for students of history, crime, and leotards alike. Order yours now!! Or wait a few minutes and then order one.
Please order one. It’s hard to make a living as a cartoonist these days.
YOU: Dan, can I order one by clicking this blue sentence? ME: Yes!!!!!!! YOU:How about by clicking this red sentence instead? ME: You bet!!!!
And here’s a sample of the sort of tomfoolery you can expect inside.
LOVE the Joker cartoon. Brings me back to my dorm cafeteria days at UW-Madison :)
Had to order one immediately! Rare talents like yours need to be supported!
You’re a sweetheart! That’s 12 more cents in my pocket!
I was hoping it would be more… :-(
It probably is, but it isn’t a lot. The publisher makes the lion’s share of profit off of books unless you sell tens of thousands of them. Once you’ve sold a lot of books, you can negotiate for a higher percentage of sales. That hasn’t happened to me yet. :o(
Always pick up salt shakers by the cap.
Good advice. Thank you.
Congrats on the book publication, Dan. Hope the sales exceed your wildest dreams.
Thanks, Tracy! If it sells twice as many as all my other books put together, I’ll have enough for a new winter coat. :o)
I was wrong.
Which makes me wonder what it was that you expected.
It’s on order! If I were a superhero I’d fly around the earth really really fast and speed up time until I get it. Then when it arrived in the mail, I’d fly the opposite way, slowing the earth’s rotation to give myself more time to enjoy it! It all makes perfect sense.
You’re the swellest super hero ever!
Anybody who considers Amazon.com to be one of the Evil Empires of the Internet can also order it from Barnes and Noble for the (surprise!) same price.
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/bizarro-heroes-dan-piraro/1028505233
But it might earn Dan a few less cents per sale, because, if he’s smart, he’s set up on AzCom’s affiliate program. Then again, if he were REALLY smart, he’d set up an affiliate deal with B&N too.
Feel free to buy one wherever you can find it. I’m not smart enough to have an affiliate program with anyone, or even know what one is. :o)
Oh yeah, I am SO buying this!
The book looks great. And probably worth a sizable fraction of the asking price.* Can we get you to sign it?
* Don’t be mad. Fractions can be greater than one
I don’t have any connection to the sellers, so you’d have to buy it, then send it to me in the mail for a signature. Include an SASE, because the cost of mailing the book back to you would actually eclipse the amount I get in royalties from each sale.
Dan, have you thought of self publishing e-books (e-comics) on the iTunes/iBooks store? You would get most of the proceeds, a 70/30 split with Apple. And I don’t mean an iPhone/iPad app. I notice there is an app for your comics produced by King Features, but I can’t imagine you are gutting much from that. You can also self publish electronically to Kindle with Amazon – but I don’t know what Amazons take is, probably more.
thanks, Indi. I don’t know much about that stuff but I’ll look into it. Good suggestions. :o)
Cool. Do you publish a PO box or something? Or you can email me your actual address and I’ll stop by. OK, not really. Compared to some I am close (Rochester) but not that close.
In the interest of avoiding a monopoly, here is an alternate link for folks to obtain your wonderful book. It’s against my work ethic to buy from *that other company*!
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/bizarro-heroes-dan-piraro/1028505233?ean=9780867197563&itm=1&usri=bizarro%2bheroes
Bah, I didn’t see Craig’s comment. Craig, I love you.
Thanks, Kalli. I was just being lazy by posting the only link I knew about. :o)
If you actually want to get the book signed, I can email you my mailing address. My email address is at Bizarro.com.
Or, just email your signature out, and we can just tape it into the front cover. Saves money all the way around. :)
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Will you come and visit me in Milwaukee?
We could have a yard sale and sell lots of books.. Yard sales are a big deal in this town.. So are farmers markets…but you have to make sure you have a dog.. 2 toddlers and one baby in a stroller b4 they let you in a farmers market… Funny gags!!!!! I love your superheros especially the Help Wanted!!! hah hah hah!!!
If I had a cheap way of getting all my extra crap to Milwaukee, I’d gladly share a yard sale with you. I’ve got WAY too much stuff. :o)
If DC had you do their re-boot I might be tempted to buy one of their books.
iv been reading your comics since i was five. and after 11 years you still manage to make me laugh every morning..i absolutely loved the book!! in hope you publish more!
go global!godspeed.
love from india :)
x
Dan, I purchased your book for two reasons:
1. Your insistent groveling worked.
2. I am a big fan.
3. I have a fetish regarding the smell of new books.
Ok, maybe not all of those are true. (The groveling was only partly successful.)
Rob
You have excellent taste in cartoon books, Rob, but you don’t count very well. :o)
You are not only an artiste ‘par excellence’, but your math skills are far better than mine.
If I weren’t so lethargic from smashing my fast to smithereens, I’d immediately buy the new book; meanwhile, I’m devoting all the energy I can spicily muster to say that the foregoing dialog (trialog, quadrilog, whatever) with your correspondents is itself worthy of a book. Privacy, if any, be dammed as well as damned.
Hi Dan, I love Bizarro, and would open the papers every morning to read the day’s comic. Sadly, my local crappo newspaper has stopped running it (that’s why it’s crap).
I chanced upon the news of Bizarro Heroes this year and bought it off eBay immediately (does that help you at all?). Anyway, I absolutely loved it (I’m a huge fan of superheroes – in fact, I insist on using it as a single word) – especially all the Batman ones. Also, a random question: Why were the Hulk on Shrink’s Couch cartoon and Wolverine Visits a Nail Salon strips not in it?
PS: When can I see Bizarro Heroes Book 2?
PPS: Random again, but in reference to your chess-Prozac-old-man-old-lady strip, I’d like to say just because an elderly lady has short hair doesn’t make her a lesbian :)
But anyway. Keep up the hilarious work!
Thanks for the love, glad you liked the book. I don’t know why those two cartoons weren’t in it. I guess I couldn’t find them when I was putting the book together. Don’t remember now.
And by the way, I didn’t say eldery ladies with short hair were lesbians, just that it made them look like one.