Bizarro is brought to you today by Gay Police Raids.
It’s been a quiet week in Lake Wobegon but that has nothing to do with me so I’m not going to get into it right now.
Instead, let’s talk about this week in Bizarro cartoons. Have you ever met anyone like Jason, who has virtually no chance of holding any kind of meaningful position in the world? If not, just go to one of your high school reunions and you’ll meet quite a few. As for me, my high school was full of independent-thinking, creative types and all of them (like myself) are scattered around the planet and too wrapped up in their own lives to organize reunions with any kind of regularity. Or, perhaps they just don’t invite me. Hmmm.
This next cartoon brings to mind one of the things I said when I addressed the 2013 midterm graduating class of the University of Tulsa recently. Nothing will open and inform your mind like travel to foreign countries. U. S. State Department statistics show that a shockingly low number of Americans ever leave the country for places other than Mexican or Caribbean resorts, and that is not the kind of travel I’m talking about. As Mark Twain famously said, “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.” 
Okay, Jazz Pickles, get out your passport and get out of your bubble.
My next cartoon this week has no grand philosophical theme. Sorry. Sometimes I just draw something because I think it is funny.
Here’s a follow-up to the recent end of the world at the hands of some Maya pranksters from about 5000 years ago. FYI: If the world should ever actually be in danger of ending and you’re not ready to go, head to Oklahoma. Things take ten or more years to reach there.
I got more than a few emails from people who did not understand this comic. It is a humorous variation of a famous scene from Coppola’s movie, “Apocalypse Now,” in which the character played by Robert Duvall squats casually among the burning wreckage of a Vietnamese village and says, “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
My last cartoon of the week was a favorite of a few readers who wrote, although they didn’t say why. Maybe they work at or for a children’s museum. Or, maybe they are tricycle enthusiasts. Or, perhaps they were just happy to be able to spot one of my “secret symbols” without any effort.
I hope you have enjoyed at least one of my graphic humor offerings this week. Don’t forget that you can get Bizarro daily on your iPhone for a full year by going here and paying less than it costs to buy a box of Pop-Tarts.
You do realize it was Anglos that created the “hoax” of the Mayan calendar? Hijole!
Of course.
I snorted at the Oklahoma comment! I grew up and still live here! Love it!
I grew up there and my family still resides there so I have the right. :o)
I love your mid-east/mid-west cartoon. You are incredible. Thanks.
Ken Kesey and I like your use of the phrase “Maya pranksters.”
Wikipedia says Kesey died in 2001. Hmmm.
Love the art. The secret symbols link was empty. Always was curious what each embedded character meant. Thanks for making many lives better. KR
No idea why that link doesn’t work. It works on my computer and leads to my old site Bizarro.com, under the “symbol secrets” link on the home page if you want to look it up.
I do not see the dynamite stick of blowey uppey-ness.
Sorry. That site that includes the symbol secrets is very old and the dynamite hadn’t been added to the repertoire yet.
Maybe you don’t have Adobe Flash installed? (Reading on iPad/iPhone?)
I don’t understand this comment, Tommy.
Dan, the pages on Bizarro.com uses Adobe Flash to show all that animated goodness, so you have to have that plugin (http://get.adobe.com/se/flashplayer/) in your browser to view it.
Since there is no Flash for iPhone/iPad there’s no way to view the pages correctly on those devices.
… which might be what KR meant with “empty link” (check it out yourself if you have an iPhone).
Thanks for the explanation, I’ve never been sure what to make of that issue. Now I get it. :o)
…smells like breakfast.
Pop-tarts are Victory.
You are an articulate, entertaining, delightfully improvisational man and I adore your cartoons. Robert Duvall nearly negated all my Kegels.
High praise, indeed!
Oh, Linda! My Kegels were negated by your comment!
When your work first came to my attention I had an odd feeling of deja vu, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on why I felt it. Finally I realized that your art reminds me of the Richard Scarry children’s books that I used to read to my kids. The alien reminds me of Lowly Worm.
I’ve long been a fan of Richard Scarry but have never thought my work looks like his. Thanks for the compliment. :o)
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woah. it’s funny you have a mark twain quote then you say things come ten years later in Oklahoma. Because mark twain said, “”If the world comes to an end, I want to be in Cincinnati. Everything comes there ten years later.”
Yes, that’s actually where I got it. I was raised in Oklahoma and I’ve always complained about how backwards most things are and that they’re living in the past, then I saw Twain’s quote about that very thing and appropriated it for that post. You caught me. :o)
“Children’s Museum” represents me – as I am today, i.e.: part child; part adult.
(Some may thing you and I are sick . . . they should be so lucky. Do you have a
pill for that, Dan . . . my doctor only dispenses RX’s for people to get well.)
ps: I’m 67 and someone asked me once, where I grew up – and I replied, “You’re
assuming far too much.” (I was raised in Walla Walla, Washington- really.
To childhood!
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