Bizarro is brought to you by The Glories of Technology.
Today in my weekly roundup of Bizarro cartoons we begin with one that ran on President’s Day (in the U.S.). People are fond of claiming that nothing gets done in Washington but the truth is likely closer to “too much” gets done in Washington. I’m not one of those people who believes that everything would be fine if the government did nothing other than raise an army, but I do think it would be nice if the Patriot Act was scrapped. And also the ludicrous TSA ban on liquids.
This cupid cartoon was written many months ago and I meant to use it on or around Valentine’s Day but I forgot. So here it is late. I hope people still get it. (kidding) This was the brainchild of my good 
buddy and colleague, Dan McConnell.
Have you ever thought about what method you would choose if you were going to kill yourself? Don’t worry, thinking about suicide is normal, it’s when you actually buy the supplies or compose the note that you have something to worry about. I’m a big believer in suicide as a logical alternative when you’re old, too sick to ever get better, in pain, tired of it all. Why not check out on your own terms? I’m a big advocate of the legalization of physician assisted suicide. The real tragedy of suicide seems to me to be the people left behind. If I’m suffering and the end is inevitable, I think my survivors would rather see me die with dignity than waste away. That’s just my two cents and has nothing to do with this cartoon, really.
I only had one dog as a child and she ran away when she got old and never came back. It happened while I was away at college. Or at least, that’s what my parents told me. Hmmm. 
One of my buddies from Texas, Brian Levy, asked me what kind of chalk outline a stick figure would get and that was the birth of this cartoon. It occurred to me that the worst way to kill a stick figure would be a gun because you’d have to be such a good shot. A knife or an eraser would be much easier.
At the risk of seeming immodest, I confess I’m in love with this drawing. There’s something about the way the eagles look that really floats my taco. I love the proud posture on the bewigged eagle as he ignores the comments of his companion and the judgmental attitude of the critic. I hope you enjoy it, too. On a different note, I’m losing my hair but have no intention of wearing a toupee. If I did, I think it would be a rainbow afro. I probably wouldn’t be fooling anyone anyway, so why not go for the gold?
If I find the time (and I will!) I’ll post my Sunday cartoon for this weekend soon. Have a great weekend, unless you’re reading this after the day that I’m publishing it, in which case I hope you have a nice weekend next time one rolls around.
Ciao for now, Jazz Pickles.
Why are there leaves on the trees in February, Cupid?
He’s in Australia. It’s summer there. I KNEW someone would ask that! Geez.
As an Aussie I can confirm that it is indeed summer here.
On a different note: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
A stick.
LOVE that joke. :o)
Most of our trees do not lose their leaves through winter either anyway
No fun allowed.
PLUS – we have so many trees that stay green all year round (like eucalyptus/gum trees).
That’s why they are called evergreens XD
Oh my gaard Earl.
Why do those Aussies chose to have summer in February….
Another reason why there are still leaves on the trees is that Australian trees are, mostly, evergreen (eg. Eucalypts).
Very funny, as usual, although I confess I didn’t get the cupid cartoon. I Googled “cupid reflecting pool” and came up with a painting by Edouard Mayer of whom I’ve never heard. Is that the reference?
Thanks, again, for your odd but pleasant wit. <3
According to Greek myth, Nemesis led Narcissus to a reflecting pool where he fell in love with his own reflection and was unable to move from the spot until he died. It is where we get the word “narcissistic.” Also “nemesis.”
Cupid hit himself with the boomerang, therefore fell in love with himself, therefore spent all his time at the reflecting pool …
This is a GREAT set of comics! I’m partial to the stickman getting shot, but all six of them are winners.
George cudda had it worse. They cudda named a car after him.
I didn’t get it, even googled the names and nothing clicked. Thanks for the background story – it makes a lot of sense now…
GRANDE as always… of course I’m especially fond of the psych vrs patient theme :)
I have to say something about your thinking that doctor-assisted suicide would be a good idea. Don’t worry, I don’t want to get all preachy, but I want to explain an alternative that doesn’t go against the Hippocratic Oath (which calls for a doctor to never do harm), thus avoiding a hypocritical oath. There are two types of euthanasia. Active euthanasia is where a doctor actively terminates someone’s life (like Kevorkian). This is not a good idea because no one should be able to end someone’s life (…remember the Hippocratic Oath, too). The second (and legal!) alternative is called passive euthanasia, where the patient refuses treatment (such as nutrition and hydration) but the doctor doesn’t cause any harm. It sounds morbidly awful to expect a patient to starve him/herself to death, but it’s actually not painful because it’s the doctor’s job to make sure the patient isn’t suffering. It’s the patient’s prerogative to refuse treatment, and all the doctor can do is make sure they are comfortable (via some pain killers, etc.) as they waste away. Sorry for such a morbid tangent, but the distinction is extremely important, and I had to put in my 2 cents.
Good information, Deb, thanks. I still believe in physician assisted suicide, however. I’d much rather have someone administer something that puts me to sleep and then death than to waste away from hunger and thirst, regardless of the pain meds I’m getting in the meantime. The Hippocratic Oath is a useful concept but no single concept (to my mind) is holy. If one finds a compelling reason to go against an established idea or mode of conduct and honestly believes it is the best course of action, he/she should do it. Thinking for oneself makes more sense to me than following dogma, however useful or sensible the dogma may be.
Love your cartoons (well, mostly) most recent bear coming from forest giving advice to hiker: fabulous.
Seriously: If the hippocratic oath were actually be followed “religiously”, i.e unthinkingly, there could be no advances in medicine. The beginning of every new treatment modality on the first few (e.g. 1000 to get good stats) patients is an experiment with suspected, hoped for, but unknowable outcome. It should perhaps be worded: Be careful, do the best you can, and look at Google, to see if anyone else has any info, before you start treatment.
Deb, I think you’ve missed the 3rd option which to my knowledge is the most common form of assisted suicide at least in the countries I know about (e.g. The Netherlands or Switzerland):
The doctor (or maybe not even a doctor) only hands over the final cocktail but the patient has to take and drink it. Of course that won’t work if a patient is *completely* disabled, like in a coma or so. But we won’t talk about suicide in that case anyway. Actually your first option won’t be suicide, not even assisted suicide (at least from the mid-European legal point of view that I can only talk about).
Another great update! Any reason why the police officers aren’t carrying knives instead? Could it be that they only hire the very best shots or… that stick-land law enforcement only shoots to kill (by aiming at the head)?
Oh, and I fully agree that you absolutely nailed the eagle’s expression. That was a really good chuckle. Thanks!
I think your dog is on that big farm in New Jersey. My mom and dad took all my pets there. It’s beautiful there.
Love these! Especially the Washington/Franklin one and the guy on the ledge (I’m a psychologist).
My former psychiatrist said that thinking about how you would commit suicide is a way of trying to control the uncontrollable, i.e. death, and thus can be a healthy response to fear of dying.
Sounds reasonable.
I love the stick figure cartoon. I wish my dad were alive to have seen it. He was a crime photographer.
Gotta love the window shot… like you I am an advocate of assisted suicide when my time comes. And, in my life it has crossed my mind a few times… I am sure that is a healthy thing unless, like you say, you gather the materials… in that case you best seek some help. Being from an area that covets it Eagles… I love the bald eagle.
Thanks for the laughs Dan… they are getting harder to find each day.
Big ups for the physician-assisted suicide comments. I have a disease that will eventually (hopefully 20 or 30 years from now, unless things speed up) make life far too miserable and unbearable to continue. I live in Oregon. I LOVE having that option there if I ever need it. Amazingly, a lot of people who obtain the lethal prescription never actually take the pills. It’s just having that control over your own destiny. Can’t believe it hasn’t spread to many other states yet.
People are too superstitious to let go of the notion that only GOD should control our exit. It’s changing, though. I’m hoping it will be available to me if I ever need it.
Hey.. Dan… One time you wrote you were thinking of having a separate page for the serious political / misery stuff…. I need a place to cheer up.. You, sir, are a refuge.. I am very liberal and believe all treatments are privy between a doctor and patient.. so this isn’t a complaint… but I’m in dire need of safe places… away from sadness these days….. Please but bumper pads around my crib…. and a seatbelt on me… make sure my foods not too hot…. I’ve spent a lifetime as an activist for animal, environmental and human rights…. and lost two of my loves in life to overdose…..
Every so often things come together to create A PERFECT ONE. The stick figure cartoon is one of those…
Thanks!
Love your comics also hugely appreciate the effort going into them. real pieces of art. thank you.