Light Starch Man

bz panel 06-13-13Bizarro is brought to you today by The Private Lives of Super Heroes.

Because I’m a bachelor with a small amount of disposable income, I hire a housekeeper to come in every couple weeks and scrape the slime off of various surfaces in my house. She’s invaluable to me; without her I might as well be living in a fraternity house with all of the chaos and horror that that implies.

bz strip 06-13-13Unfortunately, however, I cannot get her to wear an Iron Man costume while she works. I figured I’d have trouble convincing her to wear the skimpy French maid outfit, but Iron Man? Come on. Who doesn’t love Iron Man?

If you enjoyed this cartoon, you may enjoy an entire book of my super hero satires. It’s called “Bizarro Heroes” and you can get it lots of places, including here.

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22 Responses to Light Starch Man

  1. Justme says:

    Ok. So now I’ve ordered this book and the pirate book!

  2. IAMLEGEND1204 says:

    You are aware that you mixed the Marvel and DC universes, right? It’s insulting enough that you made Tony Stark Superman and Batman’s bitch, but did you have to make him DC’s bitch as well?

    BTW, being Captain America’s bitch is okay. Bravo.

  3. Drew says:

    Iron Man is in the Marvel Universe, but Superman and Batman are in the DC universe. So you should have put Captain America, Hawkeye and Black Widow’s costume on the wall. My dad told me to email you.But I am the one that pointed out the wrong suits. I see that the bigger comic has Captain America’s uniform on the wall, that’s good.

    Drew, age 10

  4. Emily Schmitt says:

    Wonderful! Ah, puns, the purest form of humor.

    Though I had a hard time getting past the Marvel/DC crossover. Any comic fan is going to be hard-pressed not to cringe- first of all, Batman and Superman would have to travel to another universe to sample Starch’s laundry finesse, and they would most likely be traveling separately ( to quote Batman, while referring to his colleague in Metropolis: “I really hate that guy.”).

  5. Barbara Ackerson says:

    Hello Dan: i do recommend reading this, it is from a few years ago, but it did not make the front page; there is a cartoon in here, i just knows it: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2021850/The-rat-wears-protective-coat-deadly-toxin-bark-poisonous-tree.html

  6. Foye Lowe says:

    Calling all Super Inventors: Please come up with the Piraro Rolling Iron, which flattens way out past the edge . . .

  7. MobyD says:

    I think I’m almost laughing harder at all the comics purists than the cartoon itself.

  8. Qwkslvr says:

    What has the world come to when the genius playboy billionaire needs to iron clothes for a living?

  9. Abhishek says:

    The Mighty Tony “Starch” has an Arc reactor inside the Iron-Box(JARVIS?!), and he’s famous in a different universe as well!
    Very nicely done Sir!
    (And I don’t mind the DC/MARVEL Mix-up, Since its humour, I think its that much more funnier)

  10. rubber_wonder_boy says:

    What I don’t get is the missed chance to have Iron Man taken to task by none other than BIZARRO – Superman’s nemesis from a mirror universe. I bet he would have Iron Man put wrinkles in the suits! [lol]

    But then again, … I guess that’s pretty close to a fine line between BizarroBlog & Bizarro.

    Now an idea has popped in my head: A scene where a party of super heros & villains has WonderWoman off to the side telling another character, “You know, I’m pretty open minded. But I’ve never understood the attraction Magneto has for Iron Man. But I wish they’d get a room!” And of course, Magneto & Iron Man are trying their best to push away from each other! [lol]

  11. SevereComedy says:

    Light Starch Man, I feel like we may live in the same Universe.

    Kinda. Except here, Superman does all the housework for Batman, Aquaman and the Hulk. Oh, and they live in Australia:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvpANWF5OLM

  12. Paul says:

    Someone just came and told us about this website! We literally just started a webseries along this line:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvpANWF5OLM
    Great minds?

  13. Benny the Icepick says:

    Would that make him the… Iron Maiden?

  14. Ellen Nichols says:

    My first laugh of the day, a tip of the hat to you, Dan. It only takes a cheap pun and great drawing to amuse me.

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