bz panel 09-20-13bz strip 09-20-13Bizarro is brought to you this time by Bat-stache.

I’m still behind on blog posts as you will note from the date of this cartoon and the fact that it is now four days later. But I shall persist and hopefully catch up sometime before the end of this week. Definitely before the end of this year, however.

I like the idea of Bruce Wayne naming everything he owns after himself as a prequel to his obsession with naming everything “Bat-something” after he began running around Gotham City in a dance belt and leotards. The bike in this cartoon is drawn from a bike I now own, which belonged to my father when he was a boy. It’s a 1948 Schwinn Streamliner. Except for a bit of rust (my own neglect) it’s in terrific shape. I rescued it from my grandparents’ garage in the late 80s and rode it regularly up until the late 90s when I retired it to hang on a wall in my living room.





Schwinn WEBHere’s the pic I took of it in my driveway as reference for this cartoon.  The handlebars are turned sideways so it fits against a wall. Does this bit of trivia interest anyone?






PREHISTARROS: Today’s veteran cartoon from 2003 has nothing to do with the topic above but it’s long been one of my faves and I thought it might tickle a pickle or two. Dyslexic Proctologist WEBWhen I first submitted this, there was some concern that some newspapers would choose not to run it because it (GASP!) refers to a part of the human anatomy that reminds us we are mammals, which, apparently, most humans hate to think about. It was not rejected by any of my client papers, however, but I did get a letter from the parent of a dyslexic child who thought it was out of line. I hope that dyslexia was the child’s only disability and he did not also inherit his mother’s lack of a sense of humor.

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37 Responses to Bruce-Blog

  1. Steve says:

    That humorless mom needs to join DAM: Mothers Against Dyslexia

    (I know. An old joke. But I’m an old man.)

  2. Steve says:

    And another thought: It could be worse. It could be a dyslexic dentist.

  3. Dina says:

    I’m dyslexic and think the cartoon is hilarious. I will never understand why people are so uptight.

    • Piraro says:

      Some folks just don’t know how to enjoy life, I’m afraid. Without humor, there isn’t much left to enjoy if you’re not actually eating, getting high, or having sex. :o)

  4. Lance Johnson says:

    You should draw a similar proctology joke with the patient asking for a second opinion and the doctor holding up two fingers.

  5. Tim says:

    Hello Dan.

    Saw you perform at ComicCon 2003. A performance I did not expect and will not forget… well eventually I will forget most things. We also got to speak with your wife the following day. My friend Francisca bought something from you but I do not remember what that was. There is that memory thing again.

    Like both of the cartoons and laughed hard at the dyslexic proctologist.

    That is an incredible bicycle especially since it was your fathers. I keep a few rough bicycles in my garage. Prefer vintage in a rough condition that I can tuneup for neighborhood and coffee shop rides. I did buy a collector bicycle a couple years ago. Every year New Belgium Brewing has bicycles made for their employees. The 2009 bicycle was a Schwinn that is similar to your bicycle. It is named Fat Tire Amber Ale, painted red with silver fenders and black rack and headlight. This is my favorite bicycle to ride. If you ever decide to let your family bicycle go to someone that would mechanically tune it up and ride it… I would be honored to be that person.

    Was not able to make your recent Sacramento show but hope to make the next one.

    Tim Olmstead
    Sacramento, CA

    • Piraro says:

      Thanks for the compliment, I’m happy you enjoyed that show. The thing I did in Sac was really just me talking to a small group of people in a restaurant and making them chuckle a bit. Not really a planned “show,” so you didn’t miss much. I’m a fan of Flat Tire beer and have often thought the bike on the label looked like my dad’s.

  6. indi says:

    I enjoyed the Proctologist gag. I imagine if he had been a dyslexic Otolaryngologist it just might have been rejected by one or two papers.

    And yes, that trivia is interesting :-)

  7. Benny the Icepick says:

    Hey, Dan, completely unrelated to this post, I wanted to write to apologize for calling you out last week on recycling the whole bird-poop gag from earlier this year. Both strips are terrifically executed and worth every laugh. Plus, it’s not fair of me to give you a hard time when you’re in a bad mood. I’ve been reading Bizarro since the early 90s and it’s still one of my favorite ever comic strips – it makes up nearly 10% of the 3000 comics I’ve collected digitally since 2005, and whenever it rolls across the screen my coworkers giggle and hoot. One of the first Bizarro strips to grace the local paper growing up is still taped to a kitchen cabinet back home, yellowed and tattered but still as funny as ever. My whole family greatly values the talent you bring to your work and the smiles you bring to our faces.

    Now, related to this post, that Streamliner is a real beauty, and Bruce Wayne has every right to be protective. Besides, it probably has a secret latch that unleashes a smoke screen of Necco Wafer powder or something.

    • Piraro says:

      Thanks for the apology, Benny. Not necessary at all, however. I’m very thick-skinned after nearly 30 years of publication and I forgave myself for unknowingly repeating a gag. I actually appreciated someone pointing that out because I was unaware. :o)

  8. George says:

    Dan–Ever wonder what that bike is worth now?

    • Piraro says:

      I looked it up once and I think it was around $2000 or $3000. I’ll never sell it, though, unless I become homeless. I won’t be able to push it and a shopping cart around LA.

  9. PeterDM says:

    A terrific singer/songwriter, Amy Correia, wrote a delightful song about an old bicycle that had belonged to her uncle. It’s worth seeking out.

  10. RobNoxious says:

    “Does this bit of trivia interest anyone?”


    This has been terse answers, by RobNoxious.

  11. Chris Pedersen says:

    Yes, I did enjoy the bicycle trivia. Yours looks similar to my first “real” bike. Was way too big for me at first and I cracked a tooth on my first wreck. When those babies fell on you, you needed a friends help to pull it off!

    • Piraro says:

      I know what you mean. I was about five when my dad bought me my first bike and taught me to ride. There were no “tiny” bikes for kids back then. I nearly killed myself on it many times before I got the hang of it. I was one of those kids that would just keep throwing myself at something without fear until I mastered it. :o)

  12. John B. says:

    Hey Dan,
    Great job on the bike, but shouldn’t more of the rear end be shown behind “Bruce”? (Uhm, not Bruce’s, but the bike’s.) Does this make me geometricanal??

  13. Robert L. says:

    The proctologist cartoon made me laugh so hard I fell off my stool!

  14. Bill says:

    Are you sure that is a Streamliner and not a Phantom? If it was a Phantom, all the more appropriate that it should be Master Wayne’s ride. But more importantly — on your bike, does the horn in the “horn tank” still work?

    • Piraro says:

      The Phantom came out two years later and is worth WAY more money than the Streamliner. Plus, mine has a Streamliner logo on the sides. The horn does not still work. I tried to fix it once but had no luck. Same with the headlight in the front. Rigged it with the innards of a flashlight but it only worked occasionally.

  15. Eric says:

    When you retired the bike, you hung yourself on a wall in the living room ? :)

  16. panzer says:

    I didn’t get get the “Dyslexic Proctologist”, could anyone make a stab at explaining it?
    This is not sarcasm, I truly didn’t get it. Most likely due to me not being a native English speaker.

    Anyways, thanks again to you mr P, for great comics! Shame they don’t make bikes like that anymore (at least within reasonable price ranges).

    • Piraro says:

      Dyslexia is a condition under which a person reverses letters in words or sometimes sees letters and numbers backwards. A proctologist sticks his finger in your butt, so a dyslexic one sticks his finger in the wrong end. Simple. :o)

  17. Bryn says:

    Gorgeous Schwinn!! I just came back from a vintage bike swap – wasn’t much to find in the heavyweight category but I found myself a lovely 1961 Schwinn American. I have a ’40something DX that’s a bit closer in age to your baby up there.

    So yes, there is SOMEONE who finds that interesting. :)

  18. Pamela Reid says:

    Yes! That’s a great bit of trivia. Also: a bit of rust somehow makes everything better.

  19. sabina says:

    … as well as the Dyslexic Proctologist, one should question the proctologist who has both hands on your shoulders during an examination

  20. Jones Garcia says:

    This cartoon picture lacks of the humor.Can this proctologist cure the dyslexia?

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