Bizarro is brought to you today by Favorite Toys.
Yesterday I alerted my entire jar of international Jazz Pickles of a case of theft of one of my cartoons. I posted the link to the site which was posting my cartoon with the signature and copyright removed and asked you to express your dissapointment. Thanks to you, dear JPs, they’ve now replaced the art with the proper version with full attribution (with my permission.) Let this be a lesson to us all; together, the power of the Jazz Pickle jar can do ANYTHING! I suggest our next target be getting the Kardashians off the air and out of the press for good. Maybe even exiled. Hmm.
Regarding today’s cartoon, do they still make those horribly noisy pop-pop toys for kids? I certainly hope so, because I found them to be particularly useful when my kids were small. I never allowed one into my own house, of course, but you know how when you have young children, most of the people you socialize with also have young children? And you know how one or more of those couples are not doing anything to reign in their obnoxious, self-centered, crotch fruit and you hate to have them to your house because their children end up standing naked on the dining room table building a bonfire with your possessions and their parents don’t even seem to notice? The sensory-assaulting toys depicted in this gag are the perfect gift for kids like this. It may not solve the problem, but at least you know their parents are being driven insane at home.
PREZARROS: On the subject of parenting advice, an area in which I am a self-proclaimed, imaginary expert having successfully raised two daughters to adulthood without criminal records, I offer this image from 2006. This cartoon is more about pre-parenting advice, however, as I believe the most certain way to avoid parenting mistakes is to not have children.