Reap Hat Wig


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Bizarro is brought to you today by But What’s the Red Pipe For?

When the Grim Reaper comes a reaping at your door, will he be able to speak to you without a larynx? Can he sneeze without lungs, a mouth, or sinus cavities? Can you knock him down an run since he has no muscles to hold him up? For that matter, how does he hold up that heavy scythe?













This next cartoon is about how certain public officials have funny hats. What does their hat-hair look like at the end of the day? When I had an afro in high school, I briefly worked at an old-fashioned ice cream parlor and had to wear one of those straw boater hats and a hairnet. The walk home after work was only a block but I was terrified someone would see me either wearing that stupid hat or the ludicrous shape of a flat disk that my afro would maintain until I washed my hair. Oh, the pain of adolescence.






bz 09-08-99 TOUPEEwebBIZARRO BASEMENT: And now, from 1999, is another person with a hair issue.


22 thoughts on “Reap Hat Wig

  1. this one took me a while… to figure out… “Mitzi”, that is… more than [just] a couple looks, to realize the mop head excuse of a dog, was on his head… “Cleverley” done… as usual…

  2. In the Discworld novels, Death is a major character, who appears in more books than any other character. He is totally a skeleton, but he loves a good curry.

    So I have no problem imagining a skeletal Death having a cold. It’s just, isn’t that Pestilence’s deal?

  3. Got to admit – I love the little extra symbols you add to each cartoon! The piece of pie has to be my favorite. Is it possible that my OCD symptoms are acting up since I can’t move on to the next cartoon until I find all of the symbols in the previous one?

  4. Scythes aren’t heavy. They make them as light as possible, as a design goal. You have to swing it all day.

    I just a couple of hours ago finished the first spring scything my acre of lawn and boy are my arms tired.


  5. In regards your queries, may I refer you to the works of Terry Pratchett and Derek Landy? You’ll find these highly enlightening concerning the problem of animated skeletons. (You’re welcome…)

  6. Oh my those were very funny…I actually thought the Grim Reaper came to my hospital bed once, and did say, “not you”. The forest ranger.. funny and the toupee/dog mixup hilarious!

  7. When I saw the Ranger Hat Head cartoon, I wondered why you didn’t include a mention of pop music dude Pharrell Williams, who recently became the most famous person to wear that kind of hat since Smokey Bear (and I’ve seen another cartoonist make THAT comparison). Still, you have left me wondering what Pharrell’s head must look like under that hat… Yikes.

    Of course, I have my own hair stories, starting with growing up in the 60s with a father who was a prematurely-bald ex-marine who kept mine cut so short I looked like a real-life version of Charlie Brown… Good grief.

    • My dad was an ex-marine, I grew up in the sixties, I had much shorter hair than any of my friend until high school. I feel your pain.

  8. hey Mr. Dan! love the grim reaper panel. btw, have an idea you can possibly use…..a “gentleman zombie” wearing a tux and stuff (or a formal gown if it’s a lady zombie), and carrying a knife and fork!

  9. Hey Dan, you may think that people being forced to change to ” the right hand ” was middle ages BUT I was changed in the 1950’s . It was a Catholic thing I think. At any rate the results are that I can never seem to find

    which pocket my keys are in.

  10. Wait! You worked at an ice-cream parlour?! You had an afro?! Oh that’s a cartoon right there! Feel free to include your teenage self in any future cartoons set in an ice-cream parlour (or post a photo if you have one, thanks).

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