Death and…

bz panel 04-15-11 TaxDay WEBSome tax day fun (if such a thing is possible) from myself and my known associate, Wayno.

 

1 Comment | Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , ,

1 Weird Trick

Bizarro 04-13-14 hedrBizarro 04-13-14 WEBonetip-300x278Bizarro is brought to you today by Truth in Advertising.

If you’ve been loitering on the Interwebs recently, you’ve likely noticed a ton of these badly written and drawn ads for “1 weird trick” to do everything from reducing your belly fat to building muscle to learning a foreign language. As painful as it was for me to draw and write in that style, here are a few of my own suggestions of weird tricks. Follow them at your own risk. (Kids under 18: Ask your parents before chopping off body parts, being imprisoned in a foreign country, or playing with poisonous snakes.)

 

 

Here, of course, is an example of one of these ads from the web.

 

 

OLD BIZNESS: This moldy cartoon from 1997 is along the same lines as these ads in that it illustrates an ancient form of the not-what-it-seems aspect of this kind of advertising. The coloring is gross and clumsy because it is from a time before I could do my own coloring in Photoshop. Back then I had to guess at the CMYK percentages and hope for the best. Ugh!Bizarro 0419-97 Genie WEB

30 Comments | Posted in classic Bizarros, daily Bizarros | Tagged , , , , , , ,

Watch Kitty Tax Guano

bz panel 04-10-14bz strip 04-10-14bz panel 04-11-14bz strip 04-11-14bz panel 04-12-14

 

 

 

Bizarro is brought to you today by One-Stop Shopping For Female Psycho Killers.

My girlfriend, Olive Oyl, and I are going to a “half-Halloween” party in a week. That’s where you pick a weekend about in the middle between two Halloweens, and a group of you show up at a designated bar or whatever, wearing costumes. It’s based on the theory that Halloween is too much fun to only have once a year.

 

So O.O. and I are trying to figure out what to dress as. I was trying to think of a costume that works with my ridiculous mustache, so I suggested I be a cowboy and she be a cow, and I lead her around with a lasso. She didn’t go for it. Then I suggested I be Salvador Dali and she be my nude model. Again, no go. We considered going as Olive Oyl and Popeye, but that’s not much fun since that’s pretty much how we dress all of the time anyway.

 

I would appreciate any ideas any of you Jazz Pickles have. It needs to be a simpler costume than one might wear on actual Halloween––no big makeup requirements, etc.

 

If we come up with something fun, I’ll post a picture after it’s over. If we come up with something lame, I’ll deny any knowledge of the event and have all photos destroyed by the NSA. (Yes, they have that power, and “I know a guy”.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BIZARROLD: Like the Spider-man cartoon above, this cartoon from ’99 is about the untold aspects of a super hero’s private life.bz 02-16-99 Guano WEB

51 Comments | Posted in animals, classic Bizarros, daily Bizarros, super heroes | Tagged , , , , , , , , ,