Funeral Rash Hitman

Bizarro is brought to you today by No, Don’t.

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I particularly like this first cartoon about a unique funeral. It’s got all the things I like in a cartoon: absurdity, irreverence, a clergyman, towels, a funny picture, and, though it seems this specialized ceremony went pretty smoothly up to this point, what happens next is up to the reader to imagine.

Selfie Sample Guru Bus

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Bizarro is brought to you today by The Least You Can Do.

I’m in my mid-fifties and have been thinking about social media lately. I’ve gone through stages where I didn’t understand it, then I got into it, then I thought it was necessary for my business and getting the most out of life, and now I’m thinking it has nothing to do with my happiness and is likely a detriment to it. Life happens in a much more profound and satisfying way in person and it is actually true that the best things in life are free. I still use it to a small degree, of course, in ways that it facilitates me, but I’ll never be a Twitter Star. I don’t take as many selfies as younger folks, either. I know that selfies are not literally “social media” but they figure in. (more…)

Snoopy Clog Rock Apple

Bizarro 05-18-14 hedrBizarro 05-18-14 WEBBizarro is brought to you today by Unreasonable Request.

There’s been quite a lot about the NSA in the news lately and, even though I have given up the idea that a government or the law can be “fair,” the fact that our own government is spying on us is deplorable. Many great minds have said something like: You have to choose freedom or safety, you can’t have both.  Personally, I’d rather be more free and less safe, but that’s just me. (more…)

Reap Hat Wig

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Bizarro is brought to you today by But What’s the Red Pipe For?

When the Grim Reaper comes a reaping at your door, will he be able to speak to you without a larynx? Can he sneeze without lungs, a mouth, or sinus cavities? Can you knock him down an run since he has no muscles to hold him up? For that matter, how does he hold up that heavy scythe? (more…)

Hissing Bliss

Bz panel 07-03-13bz strip 07-03-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Handsome Homemade Towels.

Here is J.C.Duffy’s (Fusco Brothers, New Yorker) third cartoon of the week. If you missed my previous two posts then you may not know that a few weeks back I took a vacation and J.C. filled in for me. He did the work I was supposed to submit that week, which is just now running in newspapers, so I’m not actually on vacation now; in case you were thinking of robbing my house. (Okay, my nest hanging on the side of a building in downtown L.A.) (more…)

Beasts of Beauty

bz panel 05-17-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Do-it-Yourself Dentures.

I used to live with a couple of different women, at different times, and both of them spent a fortune on youth and beauty creams. They were both naturally youthful and beautiful and weren’t the type to wear tons of makeup or fuss over their hair, but their fear of getting old led them to fall prey to the beauty cream racket. It is, by the way, astounding how much that stuff costs. (I don’t like looking older, either, by the way, but I don’t do anything to prevent it other than dye my hair, tape my eyelids up, wear a toupee and a girdle, and shove white Chiclets into the spaces where I’ve lost teeth.) (more…)