Page 1 of 212

Moody Warning Congrats Burial

bz panel 03-27-14bz panel 03-28-14bz strip 03-28-14bz panel 03-29-14bz strip 03-29-14(To enlargenate any comic, click on any character’s nose.)


Bizarro is brought to you today by Learn to Count!

I got an angry comment from a reader about this Hulk cartoon, accusing me of “perpetuating stigma about mental illness.” I apologized for upsetting her but pointed out that the absurdity of this cartoon is enough to prevent people from taking it seriously enough to form opinions about sufferers of bipolar disorder. I’ve several friends and family members with this disorder and I’ve suffered from severe depression my entire adult life (controlled now by meds) so I fully understand both the seriousness and the stigma. If anyone else was offended, please don’t turn green and bust out of your clothes over it. (more…)

Wax Me Please

Bizarro 11-03-13 WEB Bizarro 11-03-13 hedr







(For bigger enjoyment, click the cat’s mustache.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Lip Mustache.

As I mentioned a few days ago, I’ve agreed to promote the Movember movement in my cartoons this month. This cartoon appears as part of that whole deal, which is a global effort to alert men to health issues like prostate and testicular happiness by asking men to grow mustaches this month. A thinking person might well ask how that promotes men’s health issues and here’s how––you start growing a righteous mustache and your friends, relatives, and co-workers ask, “Dude, what’s with that crap on your lip? Are you auditioning for a porn film?” And then you tell them to get their ass and balls checked by a physician. It’s just that easy. (more…)

Out of the Bag

bz panel 10-09-13bz strip 10-09-13Bizarro is brought to you today by President Garfield.

I think there is one thing we can all agree on: alcoholic cats are hysterical. I especially like the ones that hang around outside liquor stores asking people to buy them booze. I’ve never done it, mind you, because I believe that providing non-human animals, or humans not of legal age with alcohol is wrong. Of course, the best thing about alcoholic cats is that if it kills them, you still have a few lives left to get them some help. There are many excellent cat rehab facilities in the U.S., as we have learned from the well-publicized case of Garfield and his battles against substance abuse. Inside sources say that Garfield is down to his ninth life, however, and is still boozing it up pretty heavily. I’m not proud of it, but I look forward to the day when he is put out of my misery. (more…)

Omnibus Bizarro

bz panel 05-07-13Bizarro is brought to you by My New Desktop Image.

I’ve been so busy this week that I have neglected my blog. I have brought shame upon my entire village. I know that I can never adequately compensate my dozen-or-so readers who have searched in vain for a new Bizarro cartoon all week, but I can, at least, rectify the situation by posting the week’s adventures here and now. (more…)

Thoughtful Companions

bz panel 05-06-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Super Powers.

I recently saw a short video of a so-called “pet pychic” visiting an animal sanctuary, and it inspired this cartoon. As Penn and Teller have been telling us for decades, there is no such thing as magic. The human mind is constructed in such a way that it can be made to believe almost anything with a little misdirection. Psychics of all kinds have played on this trait since human societies first formed, as have con men, magicians, evangelists, mediums, astrologers, wizards, etc. (more…)

Elderly Underwear Surgeon Evolution Cat Foot


Bizarro is brought to you today by Tiny Pediatrician.

I had a good week in my personal life in that after over a year of living in LA, I finally screwed up the courage to go to the DMV and get my motorcycle and car driver’s licenses, and register my motorcycle in California. She now has a California plate and she couldn’t be more proud. Even more importantly, I don’t have to look over my shoulder constantly for the fuzz. Anyone want to start a bidding war over my old New York State motorcycle plate? I can sign it and draw a self portrait on it! (more…)

Mao Dummy Alien Cat Pee God Santa Nixon Crook


(To see this cartoon as big as China, click on Mao’s third button.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Hover Cats.

I’ve been away for a while visiting my hometown of Tulsa, Oklahoma. I was asked to deliver the commencement address at their midterm graduation and had a ball doing it. As many times as I have spoken and performed in public, I was pretty nervous. Big crowd, lots of big brains, funny outfits, a giant basketball scoreboard with a live video feed of me talking hanging over the center of the room right in front of me. To top it all off, I couldn’t see my notes so I had to mostly wing it. I guess it went okay. (more…)

Cat Blood Sandwich

Bizarro is brought to you today by Pride.

In a couple hours I’m off on my mini comedy tour of northern California and Portland, Oregon. I hope it goes well, I hope I see some of you Jazz Pickles at the shows, I hope I find a bag of untraceable money that no one will ever know I have. That would be the perfect trip. (more…)

Feline Herp Loser Wrinkles

Bizarro is brought to you today by Runaway Wiener.

I got a question or two about about this cat/dog cartoon. One person wondered if the gag was that the woman is seeing a cat doctor. People who live with cats, however, will likely immediately understand that this is a depiction of a cat who is so pompous that he only sees his caregiver by appointment. Hahahahahahahahaha. (I’ve lived with many cats.) (more…)

Page 1 of 212